So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize
