The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
Randomize
