farters have to be the big spoon...
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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