Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
Randomize
