She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
