I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Randomize
