his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Randomize
