I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
I have already put on my inside pants.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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