I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
