if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
Randomize