ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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