this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize
