I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Randomize
