omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
Randomize
