I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
You work out of a Hotel?
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
I need to calm my uterus...
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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