I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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