That's intense
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
Heyyyy darlin are you busy?
Why hello drunk Jake. It's sober Sarah, I'll tell drunk Sarah you booty called. She'll probably be around tomorrow night.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
Randomize
