Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
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