your room smells of hookers.
And success
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
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