think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
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