I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
You need Xanax blowdarts
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
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