Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Randomize
