the new term for farting is butt boxing.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
