we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
Randomize
