You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
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