One girl and one boy is just not enough.
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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