I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
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