Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
