so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
two words...techno handjob
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
Randomize
