Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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