Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
Randomize
