he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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