i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
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