Fine. I'll sleep in my office
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
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