I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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