some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
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