And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
Randomize
