Me too!
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
Randomize