I wish life had little blips of pornography
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
Randomize
