I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
This is the prime rib incident all over again
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
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