YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Randomize
