Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
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