i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
so much tequila, so little girl.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
