I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Randomize
