Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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