Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
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