Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
