Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
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