Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
I just projectile vomited in a Methodist church parking lot. If Jesus didn't love me before he sure as hell doesn't now.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
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