I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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